


As deep as the ocean

by NaroMoreau



Series: A Tale of Two Soldiers [2]
Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, F/M, Fear of Death, Fluff and Angst, Mass Effect 3: Leviathan, Mass effect creative circle, Smut, Tumblr Prompt, bare with me, dubious medical knowledge, shega
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-30
Updated: 2018-10-01
Packaged: 2019-07-20 11:41:21
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,308
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16136504
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NaroMoreau/pseuds/NaroMoreau
Summary: Written for the Mass Effect Creative Circle Mini Challenge of angsty romantic prompts. I included "“I thought I lost you” “Don’t go where I can’t follow!” and “Please, I don’t know what I’d do without you.”





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to my beta Luastardust (StarsAndSkies), you are amazing honey and I love you very much!

“What do you mean she is out of reach?!” James shouted, ducking behind a cover. “Esteban?!”

Cortez aimed his rifle at the scattered cannibals and James didn’t fail to catch the distress in his voice. “I lost comm at 30 000 feet.” 

A burst of bullets and shrieks smothered James’ grunt.

“She is going to be fine. We just- have to try and stay alive.” Liara stammered, casting a singularity that engulfed the cannibals approaching, leaving them at James’ mercy.

“No offense doc but I can’t just shrug it off.” A bitter tint on his words, as his perfect aim made short work of their enemies. 

“Do you think I am?” Liara delivered her words as a whiplash on James’ face, fingers flickering in blue. 

“Watch it!” 

Cortez’ warning made him both face forward just in time to roll off the path of a charging brute.  

James held his shotgun with such a vicious grip he was sure his knuckles were white under his armor. His heart felt heavy on his chest, every pounding making him stagger, a rush of adrenaline and fear flooding his veins. The carnage was doing very little to put his mind at ease, every passing second dragging him further and further into desperation. Barbara was down there, alone, surrounded by darkness, probably facing dangers the galaxy had never heard of and he…. he couldn’t do nothing to help her. He gritted his teeth as the thoughts jangled his nerves. He held up a grenade throwing it at a cluster of husks, rolling to his side, skirting around some crates bumping into Liara. A volley of gunfire forced them do dip their heads, his hair almost grazing the asari’s face. He had been a douche.

“I’m sorry doc-Liara, I’m just-” 

In that moment their gazes were drawn by the gushing of water at the side of the derelict ship, the Triton mech emerging from the ocean hauling the brutes attention. James’ heart froze in his chest, an iron grip around him, as the canopy opened and Barbara’s body thudded against the damped floor. He was paralyzed by the fear of losing her, unable to lift his boots from the floor and run to save her, seeing the reapers targeting her. She stood up, wobbling legs unable to support her, figure wan and frail. A horror in slow motion. 

One of the beasts opened its metallic pincers, Shepard's demise just seconds away…

She was kneeling on the floor, gaze adrift, vulnerable and powerless and finally James spell was broken. 

“Shepard!” Screaming at the top of his lungs he barreled to her side, gaze pinned on her, terror fueling his movements. 

The attacking brute turned to its companion, striking it down at the same moment James kneeled beside Shepard, barely aware of the barrier Liara was casting around them. His strong arms curled around her broken shape, lifting her as if she wasn’t heavier than a feather. 

Cortez maneuvered the shuttle, placing it in front of them, as James ran heedless of the danger behind, brute massacring brute. His mind was too absorbed in Barbara’s giddy expression, the blood tainting her pale freckled skin to even care wondering why in the name of  _ Cristo _ they had been so lucky. At his side Liara emptied her clip, shooting down the remaining reaper troops that kept falling down on them. 

He jumped onto the shuttle with Liara at his heels slamming the door closed. He placed Shepard on the floor, his whole body drawn down to her, the floor shaking as the Kodiak left that wretched place. 

“She’s so cold…” Removing his armoured gloves he brushed her cheek with his fingers, Liara kneeling down next to them.

“The pressure- it must’ve been more than a thousand atmospheres.” Her creased brows shadowing her face, shoulders drooping by anxiety. “Steve, we need to get to the Normandy ASAP, tell Chakwas we need her as soon as we land.”  

“Aye, aye.”

The time spent at the Kodiak next to her unresponsive body was one of the grueliests moments of his life. He held her small hand between his, memories of the first time she had said she loved him swirling in his mind; the moment when the pieces of his life had finally fallen in their right place. 

_ No, I can not, I won’t lose her! _

Barbara shook her head, groaning and mumbling.

“ _ Muñeca _ , I’m here.” James whispered, his breath grazing her face. 

“My-hips-chest” She sucked in a hiss of pain. “It hurts.” Her gloved hands tried to unclasp her armor, failing miserably. Her message, crystal clear, readied Liara and James into action as they undressed her, trying to move her as little as possible. The Kodiak parked on the shuttle bay, just when they peeled the last legplate off her body; her under armour, the only thing hedging her body. 

A wheeze and the door opened, Chakwas standing at the threshold. “Quickly Lieutenant, move her to the gurney.”

“Doc please, let me carry her. It’ll be faster.” James pleaded, fear scorching his gut as he jumped out of the Kodiak carrying Barbara in his arms. 

A fraction of a second and Chakwas frown turned into a smile, as her gaze slid down James’ face. “Of course.”

When they reached the infirmary, James stepped inside placing Shepard gently on one of the beds. When his arms fell free he finally focused on his shaking hands, adrenaline spiking throughout him still. He drew a deep breath trying to steady his heart beat, gingerly brushing her cheek, as she shook her head, restless; his eyes fixed on her face.

“What happened?” Chakwas question yanked him back to reality. He saw her moving a piece of equipment to Shepard’s side, placing a scanner over her. 

“I’m not sure. We went looking for Leviathan but that thing was deep down in the ocean. She went down there in a mech, and then she got back. I don’t-” His voice cracked, head hunkered down, his palms squeezing the sides of the infirmary bed. 

“Lieutenant I need you to stay calm and let me do my job.” She signaled a chair next to Shepard’s bed and James obeyed her, sitting heavily on it.

The minutes passed as Chakwas pressed buttons and moved the scan screen over different sections of Shepard’s body, brows creasing as read results on her datapad. James eyes followed her with the attention of a hawk, his entire body a string too tense ready to jump. After ten minutes Chakwas expression softened, a smile spreading on her face as she injected Shepard on the left arm before an acrylic case enveloped the bed. 

“It’s ok Lieutenant. She's going to be fine.” 

“What happened? Why is she still unresponsive?” He jumped as if he had been sitting on a spring, fret still tainting his voice and his eyes.

“I administered her a small sedative. What she experienced was a mild case of decompression sickness. I believe that when she ascended from the ocean abysses it was too fast, her body didn’t have time to adjust to the changing pressure and some of the nitrogen formed bubbles in her body.” She turned to the console, showing James the scan of Barbara’s body. There were red areas around the hips and chest. “She just needs some time of recompression.” 

“But-but she is going to be fine?” 

“Yes, James. You can go now.”

“I’d like to stay ma’am.” He stood hands behind his back, chin held high.

“There is nothing you can do, now.” 

He glanced back to the crystal bed, longing in his eyes, his voice almost a whisper. “I can’t leave her alone.”

Chakwas nodded, leaving the infirmary without another word.

He fell on the chair, a stricken expression on his face while his eyes lingered on her, red curly hair now tousled on the pillow. Guilt burned him inside, a flash of pain on his face as he realized that it didn’t matter what he did, sometimes he couldn’t protect her. That thought hurt as a sliver of glass embedded under his skin. 

_ “Mi amor, don’t go where I can’t follow.”  _

His gaze flicked to the crystal bed where she seemed to sleep peacefully. Instantly a scene slid in his mind, a  scene he couldn’t quite place, a story his  _ abuela _ had told him aeons ago, but wha-.  _ Snow White _ . He chuckled jotting that down to sharing it with her later. 

He stared at her, a shiver swaying over him like many other times, the reality of having her still too big of a dream to fit in his head. He loved her so much it was painful, every corner of his life now brighter because she was with him. His eyes started closing almost without him realizing it, a wave of weariness coating him entirely. He fought against it but the previous battle and the venom of fear had him spent. Slowly, he fell asleep.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And finally the smut resolution! A big shout out to AlyssAlenko, the #smutqueen who went out of her way to help me with this part, because she is awesome :)

Barbara’s eyes shot open, the dim lights of the infirmary making her long lashes flutter. A dull ache in her chest and hips were the only remnant of her encounter with Leviathan, the memory of the vastness and darkness of the ocean abyss filling her with a cold terror. A small snore made her turn to the side. James had fallen asleep on a chair he’d pulled up to her bedside that was ridiculously small for his huge frame, still wearing his armor except for the gloves. His head rested against the wall, arms crossed over his chest, and Barbara’s heart swelled at the vision. Had he waited all this time next to her? His blood stained armor seemed to say yes. She still couldn’t overcome the way her body reacted whenever he was around her, butterflies making silly dances in her stomach, an electric zing that tickled her skin traveling from head to toe with his touch. There had been countless nights when, unable to sleep, she had drowned in him, tracing with her big blue eyes the contours and twists of his face, memorizing every scar, every feature who made him who he was. Her eyes settled on his full lips, the memory of their softness stirring her desire when a swirl of images danced around her mind.  _ James touching her, kissing her, devouring her, those beautiful lips sucking her nipples, agile tongue gliding over her skin.  _ An undignified moan echoed around her. 

“Shepard, muñeca, what’s wrong?” It was impressive how such a big man could move so fast; he had jumped out of his chair and was already next to her, squeezing her hand with his. “The case is gone! Do you feel fine?”

A light pink flushed her cheeks when his brown eyes caught hers. “Yes, I feel fine. Did you stay here all night?”

He chuckled, a warm sound that made her heart brim with joy. “Not all night, because it’s not morning yet.”

“I’d love to go back to my bed, this is not what I want for my back.” She sat, making an effort, reaching her hand to him. “Here, gorgeous, help me up.” 

“Nah. I’ll carry you upstairs.” 

“Don’t be ridiculous James, I can walk.”

“Don’t fight me Lola, I’ll carry you upstairs.”

“I’m not fighting you, I’d crush you if I was, though.” She made the gesture to stand up, before feeling James’ arms enveloping her, one sneaking beneath her legs and the other around her back. 

“ _ Please...let me. _ ” 

His tone cut through her like a flaming knife, her heart aching at seeing him so shaken by her state. He closed the distance between them, pressing those lips that had her fascinated against hers; a gentle, soft kiss. He lifted her to him, pressing her against his chest while she laced her arms around his neck. He looked down, a gleam of sorrow and tenderness filling in his eyes. 

“Yesterday, for a moment, I thought I lost you.” 

She nestled against him letting the warmth of his chest sweep over her entirely, her stomach churning with the distress of his strained voice. His grip tightened around her. 

“I’m not going anywhere, babe, except...maybe my quarters if you’re gracious enough?” His chest rumbled with laughter as he started moving, carrying her with such care as if she were a dainty damsel instead of the Butcher of Torfan. 

When they arrived at her quarters James insisted in placing her on the bed, not allowing her to take a single step. 

“You should rest here with me,” Shepard said patting the bed, watching him undress, every piece of his armor hitting the floor with a  _ clank, _ “I don’t think spending the night on that ridiculously tiny chair was enjoyable.”

He shrugged discarding his under armor, standing in front of her in nothing but his Alliance briefs. She couldn’t help her eyes raking over his body, the toned muscles of his chest, arms and legs highlighted by the shadows of her cabin. The lines of his tattoos curved around his muscles and she felt the urge to trace them with her tongue. Every fiber of her being screamed with desire, her blood thudding in her veins with lust as her eyes stopped in the front of his trousers. 

“Come here.” Her voice was almost a purr, as she got rid of her own under armor. 

“No  _ muñeca _ , you’re still recovering, I don’t wanna hurt you.” He laid on the bed next to her, golden muscles splayed for her delight, his proximity an incandescent torch burning her slowly. 

“I’m fine, James, I’ve rested enough and you can’t demand that and then tempt me with your perfect body.” 

Her lips smothered his answer, hands cupping his cheeks as she relished in the flavor of his mouth; strong hands glided down her back to her bottom and she shuddered when he squeezed gently, biting her lower lip, skin flushed and pressed against every inch of his body. In one swift movement she straddled him, his tongue dancing inside her mouth, pressing against her palate and swirling around her teeth. He sucked her tongue inside his mouth, his hips grinding against her center; she could feel the bulge in his briefs thrusting against her throbbing center, her own panties already soaked with her arousal. 

“ _ Muñeca, me vuelves loco. _ ” His hot breath fanned her face, as he went down her neck, nipping her pulse spot and leaving a wet trail on her collarbone.

There was hunger in his touch, an eagerness that ignited fire in her groin. She tilted her head back, tugging his short cropped hair, as he kept playing the notes that made her putty in his arms. His hands crept up, unclasping her bra, and he took one rosy nipple in his mouth, tongue swirling around it, sucking it and licking her full breasts. She writhed in his hands, swallowing hard as he moved his head up and down her skin in his urge to have her. She rocked her hips against his hardened erection, the delicious thickness of his cock driving her wild.

“Do you like these much?” He asked with a hoarse voice, hooking a finger and twisting it in the side of her panties. 

“Not much, no.” She grinned against his ear, shuddering in anticipation of what was coming, a pulse between her legs only he could satisfy.

He ripped the black lace apart, a feral groan and a moan accompanying the movement of his hand, as he removed his trousers with the other. The tip of his shaft glistened with his precum, his cock pulsing and ready for her. Barbara bit the shell of his ear, as she placed her hands on his shoulders and pushed him back against the pillows, her lips meeting his as her hand slid down his chest and stomach. A shiver ran down his body as her fingers brushed the head of his erection. He arched into her hand as she gave him a playful tug, lips skimming along his jawline. Her hand was strong, movements slow and deliberate as it glided smoothly over the head of his erection again and again, squeezing his shaft and pushing back down to the base. She twisted her hand around his thick cock, squeezing tighter, his hips surging forward, pushing his arousal through her tight fist. She felt his muscles starting to clench, and she picked up the speed of her hand wrapped around his thickness, pumping him as he pushed forward chasing his release. When she let go of him on the brink of orgasm he growled, a desperate broken sound.

She lifted her hips, coaxing a groan from him, and rubbed the tip of his erection through her slick folds. Her hands slipped up his skin, as she hovered over him, one moving to his chest and holding him down while his blazing brown eyes bore into her ocean blues as she used her hand to line him up at her entrance, James’ eyes nearly rolling into the back of his head. She went down slowly sheathing him inside her, inch by inch, the sensation of her walls stretching around him making her moan loudly, not breaking eye contact. There was something feral in his gaze, his pupils widening as he drank in the sight of her, his hands settling on her hips. He groaned the moment he was buried up to the hilt, eyes shut as he started thrusting. Her whole body trembled overwhelmed by sensations, her voice pleading as she begged him,  _ harder, faster _ , and a barrage of foul words every time he hit against  _ that _ sweet spot. 

“ _ Dios _ , Lola, you’re so tight.” 

She wanted to answer, to force her mouth to emit more than cries and moans but it was to no avail. His large, thick cock filled her entirely making the pleasure ripple through her body, his nails digging crescents on his broad shoulders.  He tangled his fingers in her fiery hair pulling her to him, pressing his forehead against hers and she saw him staring at her intently as his shaft stretched her with every snap of his hips. They moved in tandem, a wavelet of hot, moist bodies frantically feeling each other. His lips caught hers again, tattered breaths intertwined, and she felt the pleasure inside her unraveling. 

“James, oh god-.” Her cries echoed in the room as his hands circled her slim waist.

“Yes,  _ muñeca _ , come for me.” The velvet of his voice skittered over her skin, and her body arched when he sent her spiraling down with a thrust of his hips, her muscles clenching around him in her climax. She felt him pounding hard into her, erratic movements that signaled the nearness of his own orgasm and when the moment came, he groaned burrowing his face in the crook of her neck, his seed filling her completely.

In the aftermath he embraced her, pulling her against him, running his fingers through her wavy hair. She rolled to his side snuggling against his chest, her eyes starting to close as the fatigue of the day finally knocked her down. 

“You always rock my world.”

She barely opened her eyes to see a soft smile plastered on his face, just before he kissed the tip of her nose.

“Same, Lieutenant, same.”

“You’re the best thing that has ever happened to me,” his low voice was almost a whisper that caressed her heart, “I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

The desperation of his embrace made her gasp, a lump in her throat that almost choked her response. Her arms clung to his body, face nuzzling the skin of his chest as she inhaled his scent.

“I love you James, I don’t want to be without you. Ever.”

  
A smug smile tugged the corner of his lips. “Well, it’s your lucky day  _ preciosa _ , ‘cuz I’m never gonna leave you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Muñeca: it literally means doll but it's also used as the more colloquial "babe"
> 
> Muñeca me vuelves loco: Babe, you drive me crazy.
> 
> Preciosa: gorgeous.


End file.
